Fire and Ice: Book One: Burned (The Fire and Ice Series 1) Read online

  "Yeah, and you know what...you throw 'em away like they're a piece of trash when you're done with them," he argued.

  "Your point?"

  "My point, you idiotic moron, is there is one woman you can't have. Because you just threw away the best thing that ever happened to you."

  Hailey stood biting her lip, silently watching our exchange, before she hurriedly walked past me, disappearing into the growing crowd of customers, leaving Jordan and I staring at each other, each of us knowing he was completely and utterly right.

  ******

  Hailey

  It had been a couple of weeks since Kellan had kicked me to the curb. Jordan and I were back to spending more time together, and I had to say, it felt pretty damn good to be treated properly by a man. Jordan and I kept our relationship professional at the bar, not only because of Jim, but because we didn't need Kellan flipping shit on us. In due time, if things worked out between us, it would obviously come out, but there was no point in putting up a billboard in the center of town.

  Tonight is Gail's baby shower, and it's being thrown at the bar. Jim decided to shut it down for the night, and have a private party, which really doesn't matter that much, since half of the town is invited anyways. My phone chirps, as I am just getting ready to climb out bed. This has become a daily ritual between Jordan and me.

  Jordan: What's shakin' bacon?

  Me: Nuttin' honey ;p

  Jordan: You running today?

  Me: Hell no! I ran my ass off last night...feet are killing me.

  Jordan: Ass looks pretty good to me ;)

  Me: *swoon*

  Jordan: LOL

  Jordan: What time am I picking you up?

  Me: Picking me up for what?

  Jordan: Gail's baby shower.

  Me: You're going?

  Jordan: Wouldn't miss it...especially the chance to take my pretty little lady with me ;)

  Me: LOL...Thought guys hated that stuff.

  Jordan: Pretty little ladies?

  Me: Ha Ha... Baby showers dufus.

  Jordan: First of all...ouch! Secondly...beer...hello!

  Me: Ahhh...now we get to the root of why you're REALLY going.

  Jordan: That's not why I'm really going...

  Me: Oh yeah? Why are you really going?

  Jordan: I plan on getting you shit faced and taking advantage of you...

  Me: JORDAN!

  Jordan: LOL...;p Just go with me...what time?

  Me: Ugh...6:30? But...I'm nervous about...well everyone seeing us together.

  Jordan: Hailey, you have nothing to be nervous about. Don't ever be afraid to fall with me...I'll always catch you.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Kellan

  Why the fuck I decided to come to this God awful little bastard's birthday bash is beyond me. I mean, who the hell has a baby shower in a bar? Half the town is here, they'll soon be three sheets to the wind, and there's not even a goddamn cake! Total bullshit. Some asshole bought her a bottle of wine. Wine! Jesus. I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone. But, hey, who am I to judge...Gail is having a great time, other than looking like she's carrying a watermelon under her sweatshirt.

  Just as I finish inserting more quarters into the jukebox, keeping the party alive with music and dancing, I see the front door swing open, as Hailey and Jordan walk in, arm in arm. My gut wrenches as he gives her an adoring smile. She looks around the bar timidly, searching it as if she's trying not to be noticed. Fat chance. People are already staring and whispering. This will be the talk of the town for a week, at least. She spots Gail and parts through the crowd, heading towards her to give her a hug.

  I lean against the wall, secluded from the crowd that's gathered around Gail as she opens her gifts one by one. Jim hands her his gift tipping her a small smile, as they exchange an awkward glance between each other. My intuition tells me that Jim and Gail had been doing more than late night paperwork about nine months ago. As she pulls out the pink one-piece pajama outfit, which reads: "Mama's Girl", the entire bar goes wild clapping and shouting their congratulations. I guess the cat's out of the bag now. Looks like my intuition was right on the money.

  Georgia jumps up and down, her pert, round breasts bouncing in her leopard print half shirt, as she claps and giggles with glee. Her full red lips look stunning tonight against her perfect white teeth. If she were humane, she would at least switch teams once in a while. Now I know what the women mean when they say all the good guys are either married, or gay. She's like a fucking forbidden fruit. Maybe I just need to get laid. I haven't been with anyone since I slept with Hailey. The thought builds a sickening knot in my stomach. The thought of her sleeping with Jordan burns me to the core.

  Gail finishes opening up her gifts and thanks everyone as the crowd disperses, beginning to order drinks and celebrating. A slow song kicks up, and soon the dance floor is flooded with couples swaying to the sultry ballad of "Stay With Me" by Sam Smith. I swing my gaze to Hailey and Jordan as they make their way to the dance floor, tightly embracing each other as he peers at her lovingly before she rests her head on his chest, his hands wrapping around her tiny waist. Blood is raging through my veins, and I can't take the pressure building in my body as my mind floods with thoughts of him touching her, tasting her, in ways I have...in ways only I can satisfy her with.

  I hastily march towards them, approaching them and interrupt the moment they were lost in, saying brusquely, "I need to talk you," as I address Hailey. She and Jordan part, looking at me as if I've grown a second head.

  Jordan rolls his eyes, quickly speaking up, "Kellan, leave it alone."

  "Jordan, this has nothing to do with you," I retort.

  He chuckles, replying, "If it has to do with Hailey, it has to do with me."

  I shoot him an icy glare before Hailey puts her hand on his chest, saying in a hushed tone, "It's ok, Jordan." She looks to me annoyed and says, "You've got two minutes." Hailey hasn't so much as looked in my direction for a week, so for as much as I've fucked this up, I'm not sure I can save this clusterfuck under such a ridiculous time frame, but if that's what she's offering, I'll take it.

  I nod, and Jordan reluctantly backs away, breaking contact with her, as I step in and take his place, pulling Hailey into me, as I breathe in her soft floral scent. I've missed it...her, so goddamn much, my skin burns for her as I touch her. She tries to pulls away, looking for Jordan, but I don't relinquish my grip on her, holding her tightly to my body, as I harden against her. I need her to hear me out.

  Brushing her hair away from her face, I lay my face against hers, as I breathe into her ear, "You were right. I need you, and you need me." She pulls away from me, looking at me with sheer awe before I pull her back in, saying, "Stay with me tonight."

  With astonishment etched on her face, she replies, "I've been there, done that, Kellan. I'm not looking for a night."

  "That's not what I meant," I plead my case. "I want..." a pained expression crosses my faces as I continue. This is uncharted territory for me, but if I'm ever going to gain her trust, I have to take the plunge. "...us," I finish my statement. "Please, Hailey, I'm begging you." And I was. I was begging. For the first time in my life, I had something to lose, and I may have already lost her. But I wasn't going to go down without a fight. "Say you'll stay with me, Princess," I said in a hushed tone. My two minutes was running out, and Jordan was approaching fast.

  Both of us noticed him walking towards us, and I gave her a questioning look, as the seconds ticked by, feeling like a bomb was about to explode. She finally conceded, and nodded before breaking away from me and brushing her hands down her shirt nervously, giving Jordan an awkward smile.

  Jordan stalked up next to us as I backed away from Hailey, letting my hands fall from her body, the absence of her in my arms leaving me feeling instantly empty, as Jordan asked Hailey, "Everything ok?"

  She volleyed her eyes between us before landing them on Jordan, saying, "Yeah, we're done here."

  ******


  Hailey

  He was the first person I'd thought of calling...the only person. Tragedy had struck and I needed someone who knew me inside and out, knew my pain, and what I was going through.

  When the knock sounded at the door, I jumped to attention, running for it, and swinging it open wide. He didn't hesitate to come to my rescue. It was nearly four in the morning and he didn't care...he simply wanted my pain to vanish; I could see it in his eyes, even after all we'd been through.

  I rushed into his arms, wrapping my own weak ones around his waist as I let myself finally break down. My mother passed away just an hour after Jordan had dropped me off.

  After he'd dropped me off, I made sure my mom was comfortable, said my goodnights to her, and went upstairs, planning on sneaking out to go see Kellan. Once I had thought enough time had passed and that Mom had drifted off to sleep, I gathered my things, and shamefully texted Jordan goodnight for good measure.

  As I tiptoed down the stairs and reached the living room, making my way to the door, I realized the room was too quiet. Eerily quiet. It was in that moment I knew. I didn't have to guess, or check...I knew in my heart of hearts that Mom had passed away. As my purse fell to the floor, dozens of questions flooded my mind. Had she been sicker than she was letting on? Was she even taking her medications? Did she know she was going to go? Was it painless? Oh God, what if it wasn't painless? I turned and ran to her side, laying my head on her still chest, praying that wasn't the case, yet knowing there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it if it was.

  Watching and waiting for them to take my mom away was like torture. I was alone, scared, and wanted nothing more than to be in his arms. I was shaken out of my thoughts as Jordan said, "Shh, it's gonna be alright, Hailey. She's in a better place." He was right and I knew it, but I was being selfish. I wanted her back with me, forever by my side.

  ******

  Kellan

  They say love is blind. Well I must need a motherfucking pair of bifocals. How stupid could I be? I waited for her. For hours...for fucking hours! Thinking maybe she'd gotten tied up at the party. Then maybe she had to think of an excuse to get away from Jordan, maybe he was insistent. I lost all hope about an hour ago, when I dialed her number and it went straight to voicemail.

  Now I'm driving down the highway that leads out of Chambers, as I listen to the somber melody of "Too Much/Heart" by Ourlives, begging my own mind to shut off the thoughts of pondering why she never showed. Was this retribution? Did she loathe me that much to go so far as to lure me in, only to humiliate me by ditching me? Is this some sort of sick, twisted way of her trying to beat me at my own game? Does she really think I'm playing games, at this point? I never was. I need her to know that.

  I slam my brakes on in the middle of the deserted highway, my tires screeching to a halt. I wrench the steering wheel and point the car back towards Chambers as I hit the gas pedal hard. I can't resist the urge to go to her, to make her understand she's not a toy to me, and this is not a game. This is a life changing decision for me. My only focus is on getting to Hailey, before I realize Jordan may be with her. I yank the wheel of my car to the berm of the road and slide through the shale, coming to an abrupt stop as my breathing becomes harsh.

  Fuck. I've never felt so desolate in my entire life. I've been on my own since I was a kid, and I've never had anyone I would say I was especially close to, whether they felt differently about me, or not, nor did I mind my own company...in fact I preferred it. But something feels different now. Since Hailey has walked into my life, she's made me a different man. Better? I'm not so sure, but fuck all if I'm not gonna try to be...for her sake. If Jordan intends to stand in my way, he'll have to put up one hell of a fight, because if I go down, it'll be swinging.

  I gather myself together, straightening in my seat, and regulate my breathing, as I grip the steering wheel, put the car in drive, and ease back onto the highway.

  Heading to Hailey's house, I drum my thumbs nervously on the steering wheel, and shut the stereo off, as I sit with my wayward thoughts, most of them irrational, I'm sure. Has she slept with him? Did she sleep with him tonight instead of me? Is he in her bed right now? The thoughts are killing me inside, burning me from the inside out.

  I'm trembling, and break my own cardinal rule of no smoking in my pristine jewel of a car, as I dig my cigarettes from my pocket, and light one up, rolling down the window to rid the car of the stale, smoky smell. I need the distraction right now, and besides, the night air is cooling the damp sweat that has gathered on my face and neck due to rage-induced thoughts.

  I finally reach her house, notice immediately Jordan's car is in the driveway, and pull to a smooth stop out front. It's nearing five in the morning, and I couldn't give a shit...this has to be done...now. I ring the doorbell and wait with no answer for a moment before ringing it again, as I hear footsteps approaching the door. This is it. There's no turning back now. This moment will impact the rest of my life.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Hailey

  My mind is a foggy mess, my thoughts are jumbled with the entirety of the night's events as I sit here curled up beside Jordan, trying to shut my mind off, and doing a miserable job at it. He's dozed off after nearly an hour of trying to console me; but nothing helps. I'm too guilt laden...for all of it. Mom, Jordan, Kellan...it's all too much to handle and my mind is buzzing with thoughts of the last few weeks. I hadn't planned for any of it, and yet it all happened seemingly at once, landing on my lap like a grenade. Tonight it blew up in my face.

  The buzzing in my head...it's getting louder now. Shit. It's not in my head. There's someone at the door. Who would be here at the crack of dawn? I've told no one of my mother's death, other than Jordan.

  I ease myself from under his heavy arm, careful not to wake him, as he mumbles in his sleep. Tiptoeing to the door, I gently crack it a fraction, and gasp at the sight standing before me. Kellan. He's all strange, a beautiful mess. Not his typical composed self. His face is marred with signs of desperation. My actions tonight have obviously cut him deep. I realize suddenly I will most likely reap what I sow before my mind flies to the whole of the situation...Jordan is here, Kellan is here; and as if on queue, Kellan peers over my shoulder and catches a glimpse of Jordan passed out on my couch before he returns his wounded gaze back to my sympathetic one.

  What words can I possibly say to make him understand the pain I'm feeling right now? Would he even accept them? Can I expect my pain to be any less than what he's feeling right now?

  Tilting his head to the side, his brows furrow and his eyes plead with me, as he questions simply, "Why?" on a whisper.

  Tears gather in my eyes as I begin to shake my head back and forth, replying, "You don't understand, Kellan," my voice small and quivering.

  "Make me understand," he implores me.

  I turn to find Jordan has woken and is watching our exchange, rising to meet us as he gives Kellan a hard stare. In two long strides he is standing behind me as he pushes the door open, belting out, "Go find someone else to mindfuck, Kellan. Hailey doesn't want to see you."

  Kellan gives me a harsh glance before returning his attention to Jordan and brushing past me. I've become invisible and am stuck in a fighting match between two men vying over me as if I'm a piece of property. I'm thoroughly humiliated.

  "Is that what she told you?" Kellan barks out, stepping into Jordan's space.

  "Can't you take a hint, man?" Jordan retorts.

  Kellan shoots me a blazing, fiery glance and doesn't bother to return his eyes to Jordan as he addresses him, saying, "Why don't we ask Hailey?"

  I am instantly mortified, and begin to panic, quaking with fear. Oh God, this is it.

  ******

  Kellan

  My heart was pounding with fear at the thought of Hailey rejecting me; twisting the knife even further into my gut. She'd obviously picked Jordan over me for the time being, but my instincts told me he wasn't what she craved. Whether or not she gave into her desires was ye
t to be revealed. If she turned me away, I would be crushed. This was the single most terrifying moment of my life, and it came down to a woman who'd seeped into my mind and heart. When did this happen? I couldn't pinpoint a day or time. Was it that moment she walked through Jim's door? Or when I'd seen the look on her face just moments ago? Does it matter? Not a goddamn bit to me...it's my reality now.

  I looked at Hailey expectantly, as she volleyed her eyes between Jordan and me. Was this really going to come down to a pissing contest? "Well?" I questioned her acidly, placing my hands on my hips.

  Nervous. She looked nervous and torn. This shouldn't be like doing brain surgery. She'd already declared her love for me. Did it up and vanish in a matter of a couple of weeks? If that were the case, maybe I was barking up the wrong tree and would probably be wise to get out while my ego is still halfway intact.