Fire and Ice: Rekindled (The Fire and Ice Series Book 2) Read online

  And that’s exactly what I’m headed to do now, driving twenty miles per hour over the speed limit to get to his house, and chewing on my thumbnail as I try to decide the best way to broach the subject with him.

  Kellan’s known to fly off the handle at the drop of a hat. We could all end up being collateral damage if I don’t handle this correctly.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Kellan

  I heard the crunching of tires against the shale in my driveway. Jesus, what now? I trudged towards my front door, coming face to face with Hailey, only the sheer screen and a few feet of distance separating us, as she fidgeted nervously.

  Before she had a chance to knock, I approached the door, and scrubbed my hand over my face as I spoke into my phone, “Something just came up. Let me call you back.”

  I hit the ‘end’ button on my phone, opened the door, and stepped out onto the front porch. After the display Hailey had put on earlier, I wasn’t in the mood for chitchat, explanations, a heart-to-heart, or anything else that would constitute a conversation between us. I honestly just wanted to be left alone.

  As my dark mood came over me like a wave, I barked out, “Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

  Her anxious expression was quickly replaced by distain, as she retorted, “Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

  My fuse growing shorter by the second, I tried to reign in my emotions, as I sighed, saying, “Did you come here to lecture me, or just to annoy me?”

  Hailey rolled her eyes in exasperation, sighing dramatically, before saying, “I came here to…” Her voice trailed off before she furrowed her brows and asked, “Wait- who was that?” She eyed my phone as if it were a violation against her.

  “None of your goddamn business, that’s who,” I practically shouted.

  “Was it her?” she prodded.

  “Really?” I said, my temper rising. “You’re gonna play the jealous girlfriend card after your little show at lunch today with Mr. High and Mighty?” I bit out. I really hadn’t planned on feuding with her over this, but she had been pushing my buttons all day. She was witnessing the end result.

  “I told you, Michael is just a friend of mine,” she returned.

  I let out a sarcastic half chuckle, as I continued, “Must be a pretty good friend. Looks like you two were pretty cozy together.” I knew I was only making matters worse between us, but I felt powerless to stop it.

  “Oh, please, Kellan!” she huffed. “He’s my professor.”

  I looked to the sky as I rubbed my chin, asking, “Yeah…isn’t there some law, or rule, about teachers fraternizing with their students?”

  She crossed her arms as she glared at me icily, responding, “There’s nothing illegal about having lunch together.”

  She had a point, but my possessive instincts quickly dismissed it. Seeing her with another man made my gut churn. Deep down, I wanted to pull her into me, tell her that I was a fool to even think I could stay away from her, wipe her mind of everything I’d ever done to fuck up her life; but when I was around Hailey, my reasoning went straight out the window.

  “Did Jordan know about you and your friend?” As soon as the venomous words spewed from my mouth, I knew I would never be able to take them back, and I immediately hated myself for saying them out loud.

  I didn’t bother flinching as Hailey’s palm connected with my left cheek; a swift slap was the least I deserved. I reveled in the sting, the ache that was beginning to mount. It paralleled my feelings; feelings that were spiraling out of control.

  “You miserable bastard!” she spewed. “I can’t believe I was even thinking about helping you,” she yelled as she whipped around, her hair swinging past me with a definitive swipe.

  Confusion flooded my senses, as I instinctively grabbed her by the elbow and spun her to face me, asking, “Wait…what? What do you mean help me? Help me with what?”

  “Go the hell!” she fired at me, before literally spitting in my face.

  I’d been slapped, punched, kicked, tormented, jerked around, fucked over- you name it. If it was damaging, physically or emotionally, I’d had it done to me, and I had done it to others, as well. I never said I was an angel; but I’ve never been spit on, in the literal sense.

  Shock. My mind was being held hostage by sheer shock, and I’m sure my face showed it.

  I dropped Hailey’s arm and wiped my face, feeling defeated. Chancing a glance at her, the bitter anger I had seen flash through her eyes just moments ago, had now faded, and her features became grim. Her grim expression mirrored my own internal feelings.

  Slumping my shoulders, I quietly turned away from her to retreat back into the solitude of the house; I needed that solitude, needed to reflect on some things…everything. I doubted I would, though. Historically speaking, I’d most likely try harder to bury it than to face it.

  I pulled myself out of my thoughts, opened the front door as it creaked, and stepped towards the threshold before Hailey spoke, “Kellan…wait.”

  ******

  Hailey

  My God, what is wrong with me? This man, this beautiful, intoxicating, infuriating, all-consuming man, that was embedded into my soul- it was as if I’d just syphoned the last remains of his will from him. In a single impulsive action, I had crushed him. My God, what is wrong with me?

  “Kellan…wait,” I requested quietly. I had come here to help him, help him clear his conscience, not add to his burdens. What did I expect would happen after how I’d behaved in front of him earlier? Instead of diffusing the situation, I’d only made it worse. My God, what is wrong with me?

  Kellan hesitated before entering the house, but didn’t turn around to face me, and this needed to be said face to face.

  I took the few small steps that separated us and gently wrapped my hand around his wrist. Memories of grabbing his hand the first night we had met, as he tried to walk away from me, over three years ago, flooded my mind. It felt like déjà vu- I had hurt his pride that night, and he’d hurriedly walked away from me. I couldn’t let that happen again. At the very least, I had to try to make this right. I knew this would eat away at Kellan if I didn’t intervene.

  He didn’t look up to me, but rather down to my hand wrapped around his limp wrist, as if he was afraid to move, as if it was a grenade, and any sudden movement would detonate it.

  I tightened my grip and felt his pulse flutter under my fingers. He stood stoically still, but I could see in the depths of his eyes that he was grappling with his emotions. The physical and kinetic energy flowing between us was palpable. Yet, he continued to stare in a dazed state, immobile.

  I couldn’t just stand here all day and let him suffer. I finally spoke up, “Kellan, I…I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for what I just did. I don’t want to fight with you, Kellan.”

  He looked up to me, slowly and reluctantly, his features fraught with confusion, anguish, and despair. My heart was breaking for him, for both of us. We’d spent the little time we had shared together over the last few years dismantling each other’s lives. We’d manage to tear down each other’s defenses, a few bricks at a time, only to erect a higher, newly fortified wall each time one of us had wronged the other.

  I’m witnessing his fortress crumble to the ground before my very eyes; not because he’s letting me in, but because he’s lost all hope and desire to maintain it. If I’m being honest, I can deal with Kellan’s barrage of tumultuous emotions; irate, brash, brooding, abrasive, tortured, hell on wheels…and there’s no denying I long for the pleasure he’s given to me as a lover; intense, passionate, unfathomable pleasure.

  Right now, I would take Kellan in all his forms, good and bad; but that Kellan isn’t standing before me. The man standing before me is… numb, vacant, devoid of life- poof…gone in an instant. And I refuse to let him spend his life trapped in his own mind’s purgatory. I’d rather be dead, than to have to witness him lifelessly wading through each day, a shell of a man, detached from everything and everyone around him. The
re was no way I was about to let that happen. I was going to have to dig my heels in.

  “Look, Kellan,” I stated sternly, my sense of propriety flapping furiously in the wind as I continued, “We can settle this the easy way, or the hard way- it’s up to you. But we are going to settle this.” I spoke my words with conviction, but my heart was pounding a mile a minute.

  A light flickered in his eyes for the briefest of moments, and I knew I’d thrown the life raft into his self-deprecating sea just seconds before he allowed himself to be pulled under. All he needed to do now was reach out and grab it. There was nothing Kellan loved more than a challenge.

  The corner of his mouth quirked the slightest bit, his gaze becoming intent, as he said, “And if I want to do it the hard way?”

  I scoffed, “I would expect nothing less from you, Kellan. Either way, there’re two truths you need to know before I leave here.”

  He wrenched his hand from my grip, and I was left feeling instantly bare. He quickly turned and entered the house, not bothering to hold the door for me as he shouted over his shoulder, through the screen, “The ‘truth’ seems to be a bit subjective lately.” As I let myself in, trailing down the hallway after him, he continued derisively, “Not sure if I can handle two whole truths in one day.” Yep, he was back amongst the living, and he definitely wasn’t going to make this easy on me. This was going to take good old-fashioned elbow grease to scrape away the graffiti.

  “Well, the first one won’t take long,” I said, biting nervously on my lip.

  Turning halfway towards me, he placed his hand on his hip, the other he ushered towards me, sighing as he said with irritation, “Fine. Lay it on me. This should be good.”

  I closed my eyes for a moment, took in a breath, and straightened my shoulders, readying myself.

  “Look, I don’t have all day, here, Hailey. I gotta get back…”

  “You’re it,” I blurted, my eyes fixated on his like a deer caught in the headlights.

  “I’m it?” he questioned, his brows raising. “What are we…playing flashlight tag? What the fuck is that supposed to mean, ‘You’re it’?”

  “You’re it,” I repeated.

  “Okaaay. If you say so,” he said dismissively. “I guess that settles that great mystery of the world,” he said sardonically. “Well, I gotta get ready, so…” he continued, staring at me expectantly.

  This wasn’t going as well as I had hoped. I shook out my arms and pushed forward. “You’re him,” I stated.

  He squinted his eyes a tad before saying, “I’m him.” I bit the inside of my cheek and looked towards him through my lashes. “Did you and The Professor drop fucking acid before you came here?” he asked, his voice rising. “Tell ya what, Princess, go home, sober up, and come back when you can form a cohesive thought. Sound like a plan?” he said acerbically.

  He turned to continue down the hallway as I shouted, “Kellan! Wait…”

  “Jesus Christ,” he exclaimed, turning to face me as he threw his hands up in the air. “What the fuck is with you today? Get to the point, or get the fuck out,” he said, pointing to the door behind me.

  I buried my head in my hands and let out a frustrated breath. “You’re…”

  “I’m…” he motioned for me to continue.

  Just say it. “Oh, God…okay, I’m just gonna say it.”

  “Thank Christ. I though maybe you were gonna have to write it down, and I’ve somehow misplaced my decoder ring,” he mocked me.

  I shook my head. “You really are impossible, you know that?” I scolded.

  He pointed to himself. “I’m impossible?” He looked to his watch, then back at me, “I’m glad as fuck this is the short…whatever you have to say.”

  “Can I say this?” I shouted.

  He crossed his arms, saying, “I don’t know…give it try,” doing his best impression of John Bender.

  “You’re the one,” I whispered as we stared at each other for a long moment, neither of us moving.

  Clearly agitated, he huffed out, “Finally! That makes perfect sense. Now that we’ve solved that riddle,” he swatted his hand towards me as he began to turn away.

  “Kellan, wait!” That’s the third time you’ve said that!

  He whipped his head to glare at me, grinding out, “That’s the third time you’ve said that.” A sudden sense of panic set in as he took a step towards me. He said with resolve, “I’m this fucking close to losing my shit right now, Hailey.” He pointed at me, saying, “You!” then pointed at the door for the second time, continuing, “Out. Now!”

  I shook my head back and forth, tears pooling in my eyes, as I whispered, “No, no, no.”

  Kellan stalked towards me, grabbed me by the elbow, and began to drag me towards the door, saying, “Yes, yes, yes.”

  I tugged against his tight grip. Dig those fucking heels in! “You’re the one,” I emphasized.

  He halted and stilled his hand, slowly turning to face me with fire in his eyes. “What’d you just say?” he asked acidly, stepping into my space and tilting his head.

  “I…I said…” I stammered before he grabbed me by my upper arms like I was a child, spun me around, and forced me against the wall.

  He leaned his weight against me and brought his face to within an inch of my own. He was breathing heavily and looking at me with craze filled eyes. “I fucking heard you,” he shouted as I flinched. “What don’t you grasp about this lying concept, Sweetheart?” he asked maniacally, his jaw ticking as he waited for an answer.

  A tear escaped down my cheek as I pled, “I’m not…I mean, I didn’t…”

  He brought his hand to cup my jaw, squeezing it tightly, gritting his teeth as he shook his head up and down, saying, “Oh, but you did.”

  I tried to pry his hand from my jaw as I looked at him in sheer confusion, asking, “How? I…said…”

  “You said this wouldn’t take long.” I begged him with my eyes to make sense of what he was saying to me. He brought his cheek to mine, his stubble grazing my skin, as he growled into my ear, “This is going to take all. Fucking. Night.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Kellan

  Pressing myself into Hailey’s body, I fastened my mouth to hers as she parted her lips, allowing my tongue to delve deep inside of her as she moaned, our breathing frantic. The kiss was rough, urgent; we were holding nothing back.

  My cock had been at half-mast since she’d stepped foot in the house, but in mere seconds she had me hard as steel.

  As she ran her hands through my hair, her nails scraping against my scalp, I throbbed for her. She had no clue what she was doing to me. Then again, maybe she did. Purposely torturing me with such sweet pain was a sure way to get her creamy white ass thoroughly reddened; at least a nice rosy shade of pink.

  Jesus, my mind was working overtime fantasizing about branding myself into her soul, fucking her until she was breathless, dominating her every cell. I wanted her to be mine in every aspect possible. I wanted control over her heart, her mind, her senses, her entire being. But, as I had reasoned with myself just a few hours ago- what I wanted, and what I’d get, may be two different things.

  My life is in a fucking tailspin, and I need this, I need her, so badly my bones ache for it. I wanted to imprint myself so deeply into her veins that she’d submit to me willingly, plead with me to dominate her. I’d give my last breath for one minute of her supplication. I wouldn’t force her, but I’d sure as fuck be willing to beg for it. The irony: me willing to beg for her submission.

  In an ideal world, yeah, maybe she’d fall on her knees for me, and as enticing as that little visual is, I’d learned to expect the worst, and be utterly shocked if I ended up with anything but. And honestly, Hailey and I had been through some of the worst things I could imagine- hell, some of them I could have never imagined. We’d been down this path before, too. And yeah, I’m more than a little gun shy; I’m fucking terrified. But this time, in this instant, this feels right- this feels…real.
Not real, as in we’re present in the moment, but like this thing could be it, the real deal. Forever.

  When a woman tells you ‘You’re the one’, you have two options- change your phone number and hope to God she’s not a fucking stalker, or become the happiest, goofiest grinning motherfucker walking the streets like you’ve just hit the Powerball. Right now, I couldn’t give a shit about the Powerball, and even the sadistic fuck that chimes in on ninety percent of the conversations inside my head is grinning from ear to ear like a fat kid sitting in front of a cake.

  This is a fucking high like nothing I’ve ever felt before. I’d be a fool to let to anything stand in the way of my happiness with Hailey. I may be the world’s biggest asshole, the guy your mother warned you about, the guy everybody loves to hate; but I’m no fool.